The 23-year-old Lana Condor is getting real about her rocket ride to success in Netflix’s To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before.

She tells Self of playing Lara: “I was just saying yes to everything because it's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and you want to capitalize on it, and you want to feel like you're fully embracing everything. But I've never felt more horrible mentally.”

Condor adds: “I was so burned out … I would go home at night and I couldn't speak. I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. I would shake going to bed and shake waking up because it was just so much stimulation.”

For now, she’s living in Seattle, having fled L.A. She says: “I feel more human. Life is slower where I'm living now, and I have never felt happier, because I feel fuller.