MORONS IN THE NEWS: A Woman Was Arrested After “Soiling” on Everything

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A woman has been arrested for soiling her entire neighborhood, and it has nothing to do with SPRING GARDENING.

A 50-year-old woman in Florida named Alexis Weber was arrested on Tuesday, after she was linked to MULTIPLE incidents of defacing by defecation.

Local homeowners reported seeing human feces on vehicles, mailboxes, community food pantries, and private yards.

It didn’t take long for people to figure out Alexis was behind all the poop. She was caught on security cameras, and a detective even witnessed her popping a squat in her own yard, in public. It’s unclear WHY she was doing it.

One homeowner said he was happy that the neighborhood worked together to get to the bottom of it.

He said, “If you call and say, ‘Hey, somebody is ‘feces-ing’ on my car,’ it’s Florida, you’re not going to believe it.”